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About Varied / Hobbyist Sienna E. BlakeFemale/United Kingdom Group :iconanime-lovers-go-here: ANIME-LOVERS-GO-HERE
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A thought shot me again, like a bullet in the abdomen. I fall. Tribulation engrossing over, under, and beside me. I do not cry. Swallowed up in pain. Bathing in it like in the blood of my enemies after a massacre, a blow on the head and I'm awake.

No knock.
Your voice.
Your hand on my shoulder.
It is still burning.

* * *

Home alone again, too much time for my constantly perplexing introspection.
It’s back.
My sleep is war with my thoughts. My sleep is war with my body. My sleep is war with me.
Thoughts race to me like a rapid-fire, make my body feel like after a poison gas attack.
Inside my soul, I feel a pain that seems to come. This malignant pain that you carry inside follows you wherever you go, talks about you in your silences, and rips your soul. Would you just run away? Transgression will displace, confuse you, put your thoughts in turmoil. It never does pass. We think we’re strong, until you go through something that changes your life forever.

I turned on the news. A bomb went off in another country. I shuddered violently reminiscing the event of my best friend losing both legs, as a self-made explosive device hit our convoy. He was married before the beginning of our mission, and did not even have time for a honeymoon. We wondered how many more must die. How many have to lose their limbs before we get out of here. Is any of this worth it.
No, probably not.

Fast-forward to the end.
Suddenly - it’s quiet.
You heard nothing at all.
Overwhelming silence laid above the whole area and above the people, who had fought against each other here. Some had already lost their lives, other just stand barely on their own legs, and others again were patched up or wrestling for their lives to go on.
No one dared to breathe or to make a sound, until the knowledge overcame them that this war was finally over. We had managed it, won. Against the enemy, who seemed tenacious and unconquerable.

The wind blew over the landscape, raised the dust from the ground and carried it away. The first people started to stir, the joy of victory was clearly seen on their faces, even though deep down in their hearts they felt sorrow for the dead soldiers. In the moment: the feeling of joy overpowered it.
How do I feel?
Like a problem is just around the corner.

“Uite, prostule!”
The man glowered at me, and thrusted me aside, causing me to stumble into the wall, nonplussed. Where am I and how on earth did I get here?
My eyes focused and I saw the shops; Snacks maybe?
Forgot the umbrella.

Drenched by rain, I feel slow saturation on my shirt, fingers benumbed. Hailstones caromed off my head, shoulders and face. Did I feel any affliction? No. Was I bothered by the weather? Nope. It had a deeper meaning to me, sometimes the days just pass, No trace. No mark. They pass. There are minds in which you look back you do not understand what has happened...But you know that when it happened, you’re not ever going to be the same. I count between the days of each paroxysm, hoping it won’t occur when people are around. This isn’t how it used to be. I’ve definitely changed.

Home.

I curled into my favourite chair, like a hedgehog defending itself. I snuggled the top of my eye sockets into my kneecaps, it applied pressure to my eyes, which was what made everything so dark. My nose was between my legs, hands around my ankles, slowly rocking side to side.
I cried.
For the first time in a long while...
I cried.
I'm nowhere near as strong as I thought I was. Impuissant. Piteous. Fear forever caressing my veins.
“Get a grip” I thought, but no-one was home yet to say so.

I remembered something.
Looking into the dark hollow eyes of the sergeant as he said “Kill any soldier that you see on the battlefield. It’s either them or you.” His words ring in my ears anytime I hear an instruction.
I was not brought up in such fear, and it will take some time before I got used to it.

At least I thought that back then.
I feel like a rowboat without oars, a shark without teeth.
Worthless.
I never expected me to be a pathetic, whimpering, grown-man, acting like a small girl who’s dolly got taken off of her. I will get over this, I promise my wife and children.

[ 1 ]Wenn Ihnen jemand sagt,    
"Krieg ist die Hölle."                
Sie logen.
Es sind keine Unschuldigen in der Hölle.







[1]If someone tells you
"War is hell."
They lied.
There are no innocents in hell.
I plan on returning but i forgot how i even used to do my art. 
new styles gotta happen
I plan on returning but i forgot how i even used to do my art. 
new styles gotta happen

deviantID

ANIMEMANGAKIDGIRL's Profile Picture
ANIMEMANGAKIDGIRL
Sienna E. Blake
Artist | Hobbyist | Varied
United Kingdom
!!!♒TEAM AQUARIUS♒!!!


hiiiiiii im sienna, im 14 and my birthday is 29/01/2000. i live in north london, crouch end but my first house was in kentish town. xoxo

all the stuff below i wrote like, last year or something. its old -_-

I LIVE IN THA U.K!!!!!!!!! LONDON RULEZZZ I live there LOL always have. I've moved house a couple times too.

If your gonna go to the UK, particularly london, DO NOT, DO NNNOOOTTT GO TO WOOD GREEN during your trip. PLEASE. just go sightseeing or whatever and go on the london eye, go see big ben and that bridge or whatevz. go to all the posh areas lol.

ALL MY DIGITAL PICTURES ARE DONE WITH PAINT.NET
(i flop at sai ;a;)

MY BIRTHDAY IS ACTUALLY THE 29TH OF JANUARY
(MY FRIENDS IN REAL LIFE (or people i just know LOL) in no particular ordeerrrrrrrr - :iconwhyiskarinahere: :iconkyohei-katy-o-neill: :iconraphyart: :iconhyped-peter: :icon24-7chaclay: :iconultimatemimi: :iconmizztolly: :icon2partyanimal2: :iconkinkyqueen: )
TELL NORARITAZ TO GET OVER IT (wth her name sounds like tortillaz rita ora would eat o_o)
Ok so im just gona have a nice little rant about nothing here.......
uh...I duno... I like drawing, and animating, even if everyone thinks its crap and hates it. i just enjoy doing it... uh...yah. :) all my art is done on paint.net not MS paint coz i dont understand how u can get all those great pix from that crappy program... I DONT GET IT!!!!!!!! >.< it seems so primitive, is there any hidden tools???

GIVE A :llama: GET A :llama:???? pleeziez??? :3

I AM A FAVE NINJAAAAA!!!!!!!!! (i can do 200 in below 5 mins.)

:icongamingkonataplz:IM ALSO A MAD GAMER (especially when it comes down to Xenoblade, pandora's tower, mario, sonic or even zelda. lol.):icongamingkonataplz:

What Vocaloid Are You?
What Vocaloid Are You?
Hosted By theOtaku.com: Anime

What Soul Eater Guy Is For You?
What Soul Eater Guy Is For You?
Hosted By theOtaku.com: Anime

Yeah... i've been taking a lot of quizez lately. :3

Post this on your profile if u love cats x3
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .¸,-'´`'-.,
.. ¸,---.,¸ . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ,•´;:;::.:. . . `,
. //;::.:. . *-.¸ . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ,´,´;:;::.:.. . . .;
^ll;;::.:.. .. . *•.¸ . . . ................. . . .//;;;;;:;::..:.. .. ;
. ll;;;::.:.. .. . . .`-¸ . . . . . . . .. _¸,-¬´ ;;;;:;::.:..:..... l
. l,;;;::::. .. .. . .*,-~¬^*´¨¨¯¯ . . . . . .`*¬-.¸;::.:.. . ;
. .`;;;::.:.:... .. . . ,´.` . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .¯¨`¬-;:.;
. . `*¬;;;::.:... ,-´ . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . `,
. . .`-, . .`-¬´¨¯ . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
¸,.-~´` . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. ¸,----.¸ . . . .. ;
. . . . , . ., . . . . . . . . _ . . . . . . . . . . ¸•´ ¸ . . ; . . . . . `,
. . . . .. , . . . . . . ¸,-*¨ ¸¯`•,¸ . . . . . . . ;¸ . ¨ . ¸.´ . . . .. ;
. . . .. , . . . . . . . `, . .¨ . . };, . . . . . . ; ¯¨¨¯ . . . . . . . ;
. . . . . , . . . . . . . . `¬~¬*´¨ ` . . . . . . , . . . . . . . . . . ,´
. . . . .. , . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ,•´
. . . . . . , . . . . . . . . . . . . , . .. ¸.•~¬*¨-` . . . . . . ,´
. . . . . .. , . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . `*•.¸,* . . . . . ,;•´
. . . . . . . .`•, . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ¸;¸ . . .. ,.•`;
. . . . . . . . . .`¬-.,¸ . . . . . `¬---~¬^*´ ..¯¨¨ .•´
. . . . . . . . . . . . . .¨`*^¬-- . *¬--------¬*´¨

cat love :3

──────▄▀▄─────▄▀▄──────
─────▄█░░▀▀▀▀▀░░█▄─────
─▄▄──█░░░░░░░░░░░█──▄▄─
█▄▄█─█░░▀░░┬░░▀░░█─█▄▄█

:iconaia-roboloidplz: :iconzero-roboloidplz: :iconeucleia-roboloidplz: :iconakuma-roboloidplz: mah roboloid family

:iconkimyona-kyoki-plz: :iconpriyanna-kyoki-plz: :iconitami-kyoki-plz: mah T.S.E.O.K.P. Family - Kyoki Family.
and some randomness -
`_)乂(_' ) ヘ(^_^ヘ)(ノ^_^)ノ w(@_@)w (-_-#) (^_^ (^_^) ( 'Θ') ((s-_-)s (・_・O ( ̄0 ̄) ( ̄ー ̄) ( ̄△ ̄) (・Ω・)(●ω●) (*^o^*) (*^_^*) (*^_^*)ン(*^O^*) o(^-^ o ) (・_・O (。・_・) (o- -)=○ (*^¬^)ノ (^o^) (^-^) (^0^) (^-^) (^0^) (-ェ-) (●′▽`) (●´∀`) (・ェ-) (-ェ・) (-ェ-) (*ΘェΘ*) (*ΘェΘ*) (*ΘェΘ*す(*ΘェΘ* )(^o^) (^O^) す(^。^) (・o・)(^0^)(・。・)(^_^)(^o^)や(^O^)す(^。^)(・ι・)(・_・ )ノ ( ̄○ ̄)お( ̄◇ ̄)や( ̄o ̄)す( ̄ー ̄) (^o^) や(^O^) す(^。^) (´○` ) ( ´▽`) (´ε` ) ( ´θ`) (・O・。) (・▽・。) (・.・。) (・ー・。) (=^-^)/ (=^。^ (*'O'*) (*'∇'*) (*'・'*) (*'ー'*) (^o^) (^◇^) (^〇^) (^-^) (=o=) (=w=) 《≡^o^》《≡^O^》《≡^^》《≡^-^》^(w^0^w)^ (w^o^w)^ ^(w^。^w)^ ^(w^-^w) (*ΘェΘ*) (*ΘェΘ* )(*ΘェΘ* )(*ΘェΘ* )(*´△` * )(*^д^* )(*´ε`* )(*´〜`*) (。●-●。) (●´□`) _(●´△`●)_ \(・_・ )( ・_・)/\(^_^ ) ( ^_^)/_・)ノ_・)ノ(。)  ( ^.^) ( -.-) ( _ _) (・ε・)ノ (/・・) ( ^ . ^ )(。 ̄_ ̄。)∬^^∬ (^_^) (/・o・) └(^o^ ) ( ^o^)┘(・。・)ノ (^ε^) (*°Ω°)/ ジャッ(・_・ )ノ ジャッ(・_ ・)ノ ジャッ( ・_・)ノ (I・_・I) (@o@ ( ^Θ^) ♪(*'-^)- v(^_^ v)= o(*^▽^*)o ~(=^‥^)/ (*▼▼)/ (((((´>_●)メ(●_<`))))) (ミ ̄ー ̄ミ)(ΦωΦ)(#^.^#) (。>_<。) (●ToT●)
◕‿‿◕ ¬_¬ ✖ ✗ ✘ ♒ ♬ ✄ ✂ ✆ ✉ ✦ ✧ ♂ ♀ ☿ ❤ ❥ ❦ ❧ ™ ® © ♡ ♦ ♢ ♔ ♕ ♚ ♛ ★ ☆ ✮ ✯ ☄ ☾ ☼ ☻ ☺ ۞ ۩ εїз ¢ ♠ ♣ ♥࿂ ე ჳ ᆡ ༄ ๑ ψ ♪ ♫ ℘ ℑ ℜ ℵ η α ʊ ϟ ღ ツ 回 ₪ ™ © ® ¿ ¡ № ⇨ ❝ ❞ # & ℃ƺ ◠ ◡ ╭ ╮ ╯ ╰ ★ ☆ ⊙¤ ㊣★☆♀◆◇◣◢◥▲▼△▽⊿◤ ◥▆ ▇ █ █ ■ ▓ 回 □ 〓≡ ╝╚╔ ╗╬ ═ ╓ ╩ ┠ ┨┯ ┷┏┓┗ ┛┳⊥﹃﹄┌ ┐└ ┘∟「」↑↓→←↘↙♀♂┇┅ ﹉﹊﹍﹎╭╮╰ ╯ *^_^* ^*^ ^-^ ^_^ ^︵^ ∵∴‖︱ ︳︴﹏﹋﹌ ♂ ♀ ♥ ♡ ☜ ☞ ☎ ☏ ⊙ ◎ ☺ ☻ ► ◄ ▧ ▨ ♨ ◐ ◑ ↔ ↕ ▪ ▫ ☼ ♦ ▀ ▄ █ ▌ ▐ ░ ▒▬ ♦ ◊ ◦ ☼ ♠ ♣ ▣ ▤ ▥ ▦ ▩ ぃ◘ ◙ ◈ ♫ ♬ ♪ ♩ ♭ ♪ の ☆ → あ £ ❤ 。◕‿◕。 ✎ ஐ ≈ ๑۩۩.. ..۩۩๑ ๑۩۞۩๑ ~.~【】┱ ┲ ❁ ❀ ✄ ☪ ☣ ☢ ☠ ☭ ♈ ➸ ✓ ✔ ✕ ✖ ㊚㊛ *.:。✿*゚’゚・ ◊ ♥ ╠ ═ ╝▫ ■ ๑ » « ¶ ஐ © † εïз ♪ ღ ♣ ♠ • ± ° •ิ. • ஐ இ * × ○ ▫ ♂ • ♀ ◊ © ¤ ▲ ↔ ™ ® ☎ εїз ♨ ☏ ☆ ★ ▽ △ ▲ ∵ ∴ ∷ # ♂ ♀ ♥ ♠ ♣ ♧ ♤ ♧ ♡ ♬ ♪ ♭ ♫♪ ﻬ ஐღ ↔ ↕ ↘••● ¤ ╬ ﹌ ▽ ☜♥☞ ♬ ✞ ♥ ♕ ☯ ☭ ☠ ☃ 유 ♥ 웃 ☺ ☻ ♥ ♦ ♣ ♠

Thanks for reading a load of crap! =^^=
I will give you back the 5 minutes of your life u wasted reading this ;p
yeah i know, its :iconimpossibruplz:
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I'm not sure how to get a premium membership, or how many points i need to get it, or how long i'll be a premium member for, but I would like to be a premium member even just for a little bit. please donate if you can.
[edit] ooooh you can buy art with points?!!
if you donate I will probably buy your art (dependng on the amount of points you give me :3

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:iconfjolliff:
FJolliff Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
You notice a strange envelope in your mailbox, addressed to you. Inside is a card with a cartoon llama on the front, inside of the card says, in bold red lettering:

"Congratulations! You've just been llama'd!

Happy Birthday!"

As you close the card, you hear the telltale sound of hooves running closer and closer to you. You spin around just in time to see a Super Albino Llama leap toward you! You dodge to the side just in the nick of time! The llama lands in some nearby bushes, flailing his back hooves in the air. On his big red cape you see another message...

"Good Luck"

XD Happy Birthday! I hope you like the mini-story!
Reply
:iconsbarr12:
sbarr12 Featured By Owner Aug 28, 2014  Hobbyist Artist
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .¸,-'´`'-.,
.. ¸,---.,¸ . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ,•´;:;::.:. . . `,
. //;::.:. . *-.¸ . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ,´,´;:;::.:.. . . .;
^ll;;::.:.. .. . *•.¸ . . . ................. . . .//;;;;;:;::..:.. .. ;
. ll;;;::.:.. .. . . .`-¸ . . . . . . . .. _¸,-¬´ ;;;;:;::.:..:..... l
. l,;;;::::. .. .. . .*,-~¬^*´¨¨¯¯ . . . . . .`*¬-.¸;::.:.. . ;
. .`;;;::.:.:... .. . . ,´.` . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .¯¨`¬-;:.;
. . `*¬;;;::.:... ,-´ . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . `,
. . .`-, . .`-¬´¨¯ . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
¸,.-~´` . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. ¸,----.¸ . . . .. ;
. . . . , . ., . . . . . . . . _ . . . . . . . . . . ¸•´ ¸ . . ; . . . . . `,
. . . . .. , . . . . . . ¸,-*¨ ¸¯`•,¸ . . . . . . . ;¸ . ¨ . ¸.´ . . . .. ;
. . . .. , . . . . . . . `, . .¨ . . };, . . . . . . ; ¯¨¨¯ . . . . . . . ;
. . . . . , . . . . . . . . `¬~¬*´¨ ` . . . . . . , . . . . . . . . . . ,´
. . . . .. , . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ,•´
. . . . . . , . . . . . . . . . . . . , . .. ¸.•~¬*¨-` . . . . . . ,´
. . . . . .. , . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . `*•.¸,* . . . . . ,;•´
. . . . . . . .`•, . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ¸;¸ . . .. ,.•`;
. . . . . . . . . .`¬-.,¸ . . . . . `¬---~¬^*´ ..¯¨¨ .•´
. . . . . . . . . . . . . .¨`*^¬-- . *¬--------¬*´¨
Reply
:iconanimemangakidgirl:
ANIMEMANGAKIDGIRL Featured By Owner Aug 31, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
and a miaou to yout too
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .¸,-'´`'-.,
.. ¸,---.,¸ . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ,•´;:;::.:. . . `,
. //;::.:. . *-.¸ . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ,´,´;:;::.:.. . . .;
^ll;;::.:.. .. . *•.¸ . . . ................. . . .//;;;;;:;::..:.. .. ;
. ll;;;::.:.. .. . . .`-¸ . . . . . . . .. _¸,-¬´ ;;;;:;::.:..:..... l
. l,;;;::::. .. .. . .*,-~¬^*´¨¨¯¯ . . . . . .`*¬-.¸;::.:.. . ;
. .`;;;::.:.:... .. . . ,´.` . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .¯¨`¬-;:.;
. . `*¬;;;::.:... ,-´ . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . `,
. . .`-, . .`-¬´¨¯ . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
¸,.-~´` . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. ¸,----.¸ . . . .. ;
. . . . , . ., . . . . . . . . _ . . . . . . . . . . ¸•´ ¸ . . ; . . . . . `,
. . . . .. , . . . . . . ¸,-*¨ ¸¯`•,¸ . . . . . . . ;¸ . ¨ . ¸.´ . . . .. ;
. . . .. , . . . . . . . `, . .¨ . . };, . . . . . . ; ¯¨¨¯ . . . . . . . ;
. . . . . , . . . . . . . . `¬~¬*´¨ ` . . . . . . , . . . . . . . . . . ,´
. . . . .. , . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ,•´
. . . . . . , . . . . . . . . . . . . , . .. ¸.•~¬*¨-` . . . . . . ,´
. . . . . .. , . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . `*•.¸,* . . . . . ,;•´
. . . . . . . .`•, . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ¸;¸ . . .. ,.•`;
. . . . . . . . . .`¬-.,¸ . . . . . `¬---~¬^*´ ..¯¨¨ .•´
. . . . . . . . . . . . . .¨`*^¬-- . *¬--------¬*´¨

lol
Reply
:iconsbarr12:
sbarr12 Featured By Owner Aug 31, 2014  Hobbyist Artist
LOL XD
Reply
:iconportalpaw:
Portalpaw Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Pusheen Emote I WARNED YOU ABOUT MY CAT BRO I WARNED YOUPusheen Emote
Reply
:iconanimemangakidgirl:
ANIMEMANGAKIDGIRL Featured By Owner Aug 31, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
AMG WHY IS IT FROTHING AT THE MOUTH?!?!?!!
Reply
:iconportalpaw:
Portalpaw Featured By Owner Sep 1, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
FROTHING AT THE MOUTH
YES THAT MAKES PURRFECT SENSE
Reply
:iconallenravenix:
AllenRavenix Featured By Owner Jan 30, 2014  Hobbyist Artist
Happy Birthday \m/ :D \m/ :cake:
Reply
:iconanimemangakidgirl:
ANIMEMANGAKIDGIRL Featured By Owner Feb 10, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
lol thankss but its actually the 29th ^^'"
Reply
:iconallenravenix:
AllenRavenix Featured By Owner Feb 10, 2014  Hobbyist Artist
oh... opps lol
well happy earily BD lol
Reply
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